A mother’s work is never done. Is that a real thing? I feel like I’ve heard or read that somewhere. Regardless, it’s accurate. Has parenting always been as hard as it seems to be in today’s world? I guess we could debate that forever. There are certainly challenges that moms of kids today have that moms a generation ago couldn’t even dream of.
Parenting in a digital age is not for the faint of heart. My generation of parents is the first to have children who have grown up fully digitized if you will. We can’t ask the generation before us because they didn’t have it. I didn’t have a computer when I was growing up. My phone was attached to the wall! Parenting in a digital time deserves its own discussion, and I’ll do that another day.
Mom guilt is a real thing. Real stupid if you ask me. Why are so many moms so judgy about how others moms take care of their business? I’ve been a mom who worked outside the home. Now I am a mom who works from home. Others are the traditional stay-at-home moms. It’s all OK. You do what works best for you and your people and let go of the guilt.
Whether you home school or send your kids to public school, work in the corporate world or not, allow cell phones or not, I think it’s safe to say that most of us want the same thing – thriving children who slowly turn into thriving adults. I’ll line up first to say that some days I really wonder if I’m doing any good at all.
I mean are they ever listening? My two boys test me at every turn. How many times must I tell them the same thing. Every single day they come in from school and take their shoes off in the living room floor and leave them right there. Every single day I tell them to put them up. Usually several times before it happens.
They pick at each other. They fight. They yell. They backtalk (totally got that from me if I’m being honest). They whine and complain about having to go their brother’s game, about whatever I fixed for dinner and about having to do homework. Oh the homework battles. I can’t even talk about it now because ain’t nobody got time for that. I grow weary of it all.
We go over these same issues day after day. I wonder if it even matters because it seems that they’re never listening or simply choosing not to care. I love them to the smallest pieces so I can’t give up on them but oh I get tired of banging my head on the proverbial wall. Something tells me I’m not alone here. I want all of us moms with still-growing children to know that we’re not alone.
You don’t like your kid today. It’s OK. Had all of the mouthiness you can handle today. It’s OK. You feel like you’re just spinning your wheels. It’s OK. Tired of every single trip in or out of the house being an ordeal. It’s OK. You are not alone. And maybe more importantly, don’t give up. Rest when you can. Vent when you need to. Just don’t give up.
There’s more getting through than we think. I’m not a child behavior expert so I’m not going talk about the reasons they do what they do. But I do know that sometimes I get glimpses of the people that I pray they will one day become.
When a teacher tells me that one of mine offered to do something extra nice for a child with special needs, I see it. When the other one wants to take a gift to a teacher because she liked something and he wanted to be nice, I see it. When we sit down to eat dinner and they say grace, I see it. When their Dad gets home from work and they ask how his day was, I see it. When one of them draws me a special picture (the one above) that shows my parents and my grandmothers as angels, I see it.
Listen moms, I know the daily grind is so very heavy. I’m carrying it, too. But this work matters the most. This work of pouring the good stuff into your littles is a big deal. Keep at it moms. You’re doing fine. They’re going to be OK. They hear you. Through the video games and fighting and yelling and hurried schedules, they hear you. Don’t give up.
